But if ***** wants to get filthy... Tell her to throw a text my way ;)
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
he pulled a $400 bottle of champagne out of the back part of his toiled and I was ready to blow him then and there
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
If it meant we had chicks like that every weekend I would gay marry the shit out of you dude
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I walked in the kitchen and heard her saying "We could have been so good together" as she caressed an egg with her cheek.
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
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