i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
i secretly love the power trip of being their RA & busting these idiots for everything i did as a freshman
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
He kept his baseball cap on when he went down on me...
There's always one sober annoying person at a party. I hate responsible people. I just wanted to show everyone my nipples. There cute. She didn't have to stop me
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
NO TEQUILA
Why do I always think it's a good idea? Like a challenge? Shit maybe I should CHALLEGE myself to get laid for once instead
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
He'll only communicate through snapchat with pictures of him holding his cat or his dick. Bit of Russian roulette opening them in public but I did it anyway.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
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