Sadly no. But I was pantsless when they came to get me. Which made me miss you...
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
He washed my hair whilst I gave him head in the shower. Bored or gay?
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
I'll make some time for you! I don't know how long you need to get off, but I should only need 2-7 minutes, pending what kind of socks I have on.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
So I told him it takes a lot to get me drunk & he said he was the heavyweight champion in college. We high-fived. Obviously I'm the favorite child.
The more I drank he just got hotter and hotter. And then the mustache didn't look too bad
I mean I've seen her tits but I don't know what her voice sounds like
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
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