In the future we'll all be gay
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
This is getting serious. I keep forgetting what's in my vagina.
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
Did you guys have sex yet? And don't worry, I broke the ice already by sending this to both of you. So you can just jump right into it. You're welcome.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
We could have had it all. And by all I mean sex in your Toyota Corolla.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
our jesse-walt dynamic is actualy really perfect because i want to start a small time drug empire and you want to get high a lot its very accurate
Pregnancy test = positive. Hope you still have our old guess who game 'cause daddy elimination begins now.
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I totally have a huge crush on him though which is fucking up my "classy she-demon with limited feelings" vibe
He's being awfully beer snobby for a guy who ordered salad
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