I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
make any headway on the foot/dick situation?
Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just saw some airport workers running through the terminal with liquor bottles. That's my kind of emergency.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was in bed at 845. Affairs take a lot out of people
She used the introduce me to her roommates so she could find out my name trick the next morning..I may be in love.
Lesson of the night- sweaty dick can get stuck to ice, and require medical attention.
Like, actually questioning if you ate dog shit last night
Either im tripping real hard, or there's a legit land shark in my apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
I wanna say I regret bonging a beer while having sex with Mike, but it helped me get thru it.
I don't need tinder boy anymore but I do need free sushi
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Just got your voicemail. The 3am call wasn't a drunk dial, it was an I left my phone in my pocket then has wild animalistic sex dial...
I hate you.
You LOVE me.
Randomize