Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
The highlight of my Saturday night was singing along to the sound of music alone in my room.
i will never coherently bang her
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
Leaving my wallet at work and not going out to drink tonight...SIGN FROM THE UNIVERSE.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
the first cop to show up was this girl who hooked up with our home ec teacher in high school, she knows about questionable decisions
Car is still out of commission. Looks like it's Grape Nuts and scotch for dinner.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
I walked so much yesterday and I was like holy fuck I need to do some cardio apart from sex cause this is ridic
Tight. Want to get up, make coffee, sit on separate couches and silently read our mobile devices together?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
i think we reached that point in our drunkenness where even the creeps found us intolerable
Randomize
