So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
IT'S LINGERIE PURCHASED FROM A FLEA MARKET, THE ONLY THING IT'S GOING TO BE POSITIVE FOR IS A TEST FOR HIV
Poking every semi-decent guy on Facebook in the hopes that one of them will want to hook up with me tonight. So far all i've accomplished is 5 new poke wars which i will most certainly continue after this weekend.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
Today I learned that when you lick a mans butthole, you get wined and dined at a nice french restaurant.
I honestly just wanna put my face in her tits and disappear from this plane of existence
Couch. On fire.
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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