dont like to call her my roomate, too cordial. i refer to her as the whore that was assigned to live with me
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
well considering we left the bathroom with the mirror off the wall, a bloody nose, and clothes all messed up they assume im just a coke whore now..
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
I performed "get broken glass out of my shoulder" surgery last night... Drunk, with a what-a-burger straw.
The only thing I regret was that he was wearing a scarf when we made out.
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I just had really awesome sex bent over the side of an air hockey table. That is all. Happy thanksgiving.
Besides you're a Tennessee fan and it'd be against my religion to have your penis inside me today.
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Ha! Just garden hosed my vag and thought of you.
He broke through his window then signed his name on the biggest peice of glass from it. I think they framed it and named it 'best party ever'
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
Randomize
