my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
you assured me you'd make it home safe because your pizza rolls were waiting up for you.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
This is classic penis vs brain.
Well you fished my watch out of a possibly vomit filled toilet so I think we're bros now.
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
If I'm legally allowed to go to jail than I should legally be allowed to tell a cop to fuck off. Basic principles.
Yea, but did you really have to throw a sandwich at him??
it was an ACCIDENT
it was a DICK
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
What's the weirdest place you've ever had sex?
I don't think you're psychologically prepared for this conversation.
Randomize
