Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
We can't ever have kids because there's a chance that they'll end up just like us.
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
I'm really really gonna try not to at least one night. The 4 day thanksgiving bender almost killed me last year
I've been at work 30 min broke a paper towel holder a chair set a box on fire and fell down twice. Hungover Brian just reached a new level
I just think that if you're going to run around naked outside, a feather boa should be involved. Half for the flair and half for an emergency cover.
That's what jaeger bombs out of teacups will do to you.
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
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