Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
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I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
It's a noodle incident. All I can say is that it was completely accidental, no one was too seriously injured, and I'm not allowed back to that bar without a designated pusher for my wheelchair.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
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