She is totes cute on her twitter. Which totally sounds like a euphemism for coot.
Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What kind of person begs for a BJ from someone who just got their wisdom teeth out?
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I'm sorry I can't get drinks with you. I have to make sure my dad doesn't go to jail.
I remember trying to cut the power to a house I thought was "too bright to understand the meaning of christmas". Pretty sure I blacked out down the street.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Good news!! I can adult!! π turning down the strip club on a weeknight has become my crowning achievement ππ
The last time I saw you you got angry and yelled "WHISKEY DOESNT COUNT" ... I think that's at least a 7 on the hotmess scale.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
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