New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
well there was some sort of sex marathon going on in my house last night..jess and i vs my parents...and im ashamed to say that we lost and my parents out-sexed us
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
dude, seriously he just sucked the milk out of the dogs breast and swallowed it... for $20, wtf....?
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
WHAT IS ALL THIS WATER BOTTLE FLIPPING NONSENSE? WHAT IS LIT?
YOUTHS.
Apparently walking into a national conference and proclaiming "i'm here to fuck shit up" is frowned upon.
Who knew?
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
