i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
found POGS while I was cleaning my room this morning. Definitely bringing them back to school to turn into a drinking game.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
I had some like war flashbacks of giving someone a handjob and i was trying to figure out who it was.
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I'll see ya tonight at your house...and I'm bringing you a special treat that starts with a V and ends with us eventually going to rehab one day.
If you feel like laying around and watching a movie, that's where I'll be for the next several hours not moving, blaming others, and generally feeling sorry for myself.
So I found "Fat chicks in saran wrap" in my search history.
That's all you talk about when you are wasted.
Hypothetically speaking, what is the proper response if one gets bitten by a most likely not rabid squirrel? Hypothetically.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
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I'm like a number 27.2 on a scale of 1-10 of how badly I want you right now.
Your lack of a response brings it down to a 25.4.
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
Go for gold. Two birds with one vag.
When you put my balls in your mouth i just want to buy you expensive gifts...you know what i mean?
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
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