I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
I haven't been able to trust a girl since spanks came out
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
It's fine. I wouldn't trust either of them to be my workplace drug buddy.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
On the way home she told me she was in kindergarten when 9/11 happened
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
Randomize
