Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
So drunk, too bad you don't want this
hey I'm just gonna fall asleep in the bathroom at the library call me when you're done with class
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
i look like a southern belle. however, i am around a million kegs. so i will be a southern shitshow.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
The dude at Coffee Bean just handed me my tea latte and whispered, "pomegranate blueberry is such a sexy flavor". With a wink. I'm almost certain that there's an STD floating around in my drink.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Dude, I danced with Abe Lincoln! How could last night have been any better???
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
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