We won't sleep together?
they need to just BURY HIM!
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
we turned studying into a drinking game, she drinks when she gets it right, i drink when she gets it wrong. so we'll be out soon
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
On a totally unrelated note, captain four hour sexcapades lost it in his boxers this morning and tried to pretend it didnt happen. Lmao
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
SITTING NEXT TO A CIRCUS PERFORMER AT PLANNED PARENTHOOD. THIS IS MY LIFE.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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