Smith looks like a guy that goes on a lot of first dates
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
I looked him in the face and asked if we could stop. he asked why. I said "I can't feel it.". ...I feel bad; I should have faked.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
im gonna call it quits for tonight... I am so drunk I dont even have the motor skills to masturbate
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Unless you consider jello shots food the answer is no there is no dinner here. When u get food get more wine too tired of you coming over drinking all my booze and destroying my vagina
i refuse to hook up with a girl that looks like drew carey.
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I woke up, topless, my car was parked funny so I threw on my hoodieto go fix it and found a jello shot in my pocket. where did I go last night?!
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
When the paramedic asked Logan how he fell he explained that he was trying to lick his eyeball, missed and tripped over his own tongue.
Randomize
