East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Just calculated that for my last final tomorrow I need 120% to improve my grade and 53% to keep it..buying 30 packs now, go get dressed
i woke up to the sound of my roommate climbing onto my desk mumbling that she was going to bed
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
You stole my camera, took a picture of yourself and said "that's beautiful, just as beautiful as our waitress".
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
She said my new name was "ranch" because I "looked delicious"
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Dude, he danced with the dog that some random chick was carrying at the bar. Then the dog jumped out of his arms and ran away. THAT definitely deserves a drink.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Randomize
