i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Could be my worst decision since the whole 'third degree burn' fiasco.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
I told her I named my penis "The Spirit of Exploration." That's all it took.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
I wish there was a tumbleweed emoji. Because that would describe my vagina.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
if anyone asks you the platypus in my bathtub is a gift...thats all anyone needs to know
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
