This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
When black out puking doesn't involve crying and promises to never get drunk again... to just a subtle, 'excuse me while I go vomit in the bathroom of this bar'.. you know you've finally grown up.
Shots and making dong molds for my gf's friends. Typical Monday night activities.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Imagine getting a FB inbox "hey I found your ID on the floor of a bar can you send me a mugshot so I can get a second piece of ID made?"
She ran over a curb, took out a yard-sale sign and hit a fence before admitting to me that she may be losing her vision "a bit". Never letting grandma drive again.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
LEAVE ME AND MY NIPPLES ALONE
Listen I'm tryna celebrate your divorce. Sometimes that calls for drinking on the toilet.
I just want to bone him one last time before he moves across the country with his new (average looking) girl friend.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
You threw away your W2 to make more room in your purse for liquor.
Last thing googled on my laptop last night was vagina chaffing. What the fuck?
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