No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
I'm passing your future prison.
just customized my debit card w a pic of me ralphing over the toilet. figure it'll give the bar keep a good cut off est and for shits n giggles when buying my handles at the liqour store
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
You're like the curious george of whores
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
When I finally got there you were bleeding all over and you just kept saying over and over that the dog was your only friend at the party.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
She hash-tagged my name. I think it's safe to say that she remembers our hookup.
Congratulations! You can now legally do that thing you said you never do again!
THANKS! I'M SO EXCITED TO NOT DO THE THING
OMG YOU GO OUT AND NOT DO THAT THING, GIRL! I SUPPORT YOU 100%!!!
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
I think I'm just gonna exercise my lungs and fingers. With bong hits and crochet. BECAUSE I AM A REAPONSIBLE ADULT DAMMIT!!
It's a shame, really, because he's got the cock of a horse... And the personality of dry toast.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
Randomize
