She went from zero to smokin in five shots
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Did I hear correctly when it sounded like he said "just don't let me throw up into your vaj?"
i can't decided whether the fact that her nipples are bigger then her palms is a problem or not
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
you called me in the middle of the night, wandering the streets, in search of "the ultimate burrito"
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
At what point does "I'm too high to deal with you right now" stop being rude?
I damn near set my vagina on fire. WHILE The Flaming Lips played in the background. Intensely apropos.
I told this guy in the dining hall that he's a hippie god and he's never made eating yogurt so sexy
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I hate who I am becoming
I think of it as growth but I also hate who I am becoming as well
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
Randomize
