the pool opens at 11. by 1115 the ambulance had been called.
I had to go to the bank to confirm purchases made on 10/31/09 because they were signed as Lady Gaga
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
His whole family saw that I had cum in my hair once they turned on the blacklight at the bowling alley. You should have seen his mother's face.
23 Theme Park Employees Confess The Biggest Adult Tantrums They’ve Witnessed
Paying 5 grand for boobs is saving me like 10 grand in weed
I literally just wielded a katana to save a child's life. What did you do today?
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
23 Crazy Psychological Tricks You Have To Try on Someone RIGHT NOW
It's like you're the one guy who got the "girls have clits" memo.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
What's the policy on calling guys who have kids daddy...
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
I think I got into an argument with my cat's former owner about what a BDSM relationship entails.