ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
I drunk dialed my ex-boyfriend last night. He was sitting next to my new boyfriend. Shoot me in the face.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
Randomize
