pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
dude. we need more in our fridge then just beer and applesauce.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
thanks for waiting 12 hours to ask if I was in a ditch or not
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
Everything was going well until he very loudly said that he wanted to cum on my fingernails.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
THE COP WHO TOOK MY MUGSHOT LAST NIGHT JUST ADDED ME ON FACEBOOK
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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