It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
Make puking fun. Chug half a monster right before you blow. Throw up foam. Most unique experience ever.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
you didn't want to pay for the shots so you negotiated with the bartenders. Apparently 1 shot is worth 5 seconds of motor-boating you.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
It's beautiful and huge. Like a dinosaur.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
So my dad just asked, "did you leave without pants a lil bit ago?"
Randomize
