i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
the meat mosque collapsed into the alcohol moat
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
how much ball-pain constitutes an emergency?
I woke up to the sound of him repeatedly tapping out SOS in Morse Code using his hard cock.
The paramedics were not my fault this time.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
Eating power bars and masterbating... That's kinda my life right now. Is this what having a boyfriend means?
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
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