Dude, 1 prime defect in the snuggie- you can't fuck someone discreetly under a snuggie. No way no how
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
How the hell did he get a boner in that type of situation?
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
my head gets it he sucks but my LAME FUCKING HEART IN MY VAGINA doesnt
i didnt have any regrets until i found out he was a freshman.... and the only reason he got into yale was because of soccer... and he wasnt premed.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
He came so fast i dont think he got it all the way in. He apologized and gave me his favorite baseball card.
She should be a lawyer. She convinced her husband to give her a hall pass AFTER he walked in on her in bed with her ex-bf
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
