Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Imagine the time you most wanted to kill yourself. Now add a room full of jail bait and no booze. Multiply that by a million.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
She literally got down on all fours and I swear did a 360 degrees head rotation exorcist barf...and then moaned IT WAS THE TACO BEEEELLLLLL
so no, not her best night
i introduced myself to everyone by my new name, thundergooch. i threatened the neighbors with a hammer when they used my real name. needless to say, sailor jerry was not kind to me.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
I have no idea what that means but I'm googling things just so I can watch my thumbs move
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He tried to tell me that that stripper was his aunt..
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
Lunch?
Massage?
Spanking with handcuffs?
The girl at the liquor store remembered me as "the girl who pays in hundreds" so she didn't ID me
Remember those neighbors I thought were FBI agents? Turns out they're DEA.
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