So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
Drunk roommate walked in on us and asked if we wanted to go eat a sandwich with her in the bathroom.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
I've been buying my puppy dildos for chew toys. I can't wait till a girl comes over and my dog is gnawing on a giant black cock
Why is there a chocalet milkshake outside our front door?
Alcohol
the kid next to me in math class is drawing gay porn. it's good, but that is beside the point
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
They're the one who can profit the most when given the opportunity for blackmail.
At least that's how I've always seen it whenever I've been the Designated Driver.
That simultaneously explains everything and makes me very very terrified of you.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
he high fived his dick after we had sex
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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