on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
They just asked a fat guy to move to the other side of the plane. Send me a pic of your tits incase we crash
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
She literally just changed his birthday. Overly attached girlfriend has nothing on her.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
just saw a sign in the bar that says "no more naked fridays". Where the fuck was I on these naked fridays?
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
No no no he wouldn't talk to me before I showed his best friend how good I am at twerking
WHAT HAS MY LIFE COME TO I'M MAKING A SCARF FOR A PENIS
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
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