Well douche your snatch and let's go!
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
And then you proceeded to sneak behind thee bar and hold up an empty bottle of vodka and scream LOOK WHO THE BARTENDER IS NOW BITCH!
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
say penis size is all related to how funny you are and then tell a feminist joke. if she laughs, you got double points, if she slaps you, she probably wasn't going to sleep with you anyway
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
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