Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
ttyl tear gas
Oh shit. There are penis maracas
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
You seem like the type to go to a craft sale baked out of your mind. I like you.
Guys I ate pizza off the fucking ground of the cab. I am the worst type of person
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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