well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
It seems like every guy I've hooked up with all end up hanging out together, its like a cult.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
It mathmatically balances. Less pants + more shirt = fully clothed. see? Not a whore!
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
He showed up on school grounds wearing nothing but a suit of armor. Really at this point I'm more impressed than angry.
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
