i dont know whats so great about being respectable.
three words: i give head
three words: not that well
What a tease, dude. She's giving me emotional blue balls.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
maybe it wasnt such a good idea to pregame our lease signing...
Also managed to rip my pants and set myself on fire. And oddly enough I'm still not ready to ask for 2010 back.
BTW. If I show up really drunk and dressed a cowboy, don't be alarmed
do you think its obvious that we spent all afternoon playing naked body oil twister?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
I mean technically the bite was both in my nose and on the outside of it. I thought I was going to need stitches or something.
Why was his mouth around your nose anyways?
It was just one of those nights, man.
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
EX BOYFRIEND'S TWINS WERE BORN TODAY. THIS CALLS FOR A MARG.
Randomize
