We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
i want to bang the Snorg tees girl.. shes always smiling ;)
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
I smell like icyhot and vodka... Heres to my pulled tendon.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I got tossed from adult league soccer for telling a 55 year old I'd break his hip. I'm a productive member of society
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
I saw the attitude and didn't even try. Line of the night from one guy who talked with them for a while said, "I don't meet you standards. I have a job and would treat you well." She was blank faced.
Will you still call me Bond when I'm sober?
You know that tattoo place next to Dallas? The naked sexy frog on my neck is proof that their "won't tattoo if drunk" sign is bullshit!
Randomize
