he was fingering me to the beat of a lady gaga song. new high? new low? i don know, but i came, so whatever.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I decided to start over my porn collection by deleting the old stuff. That was a sad piece of a pie chart...
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
Ive done some fucked up shit, but last night was the first I have Poured milk on anothers mans face in the shower.
did you just send me my own nude
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
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