Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
he asked me to marry him on one of those scrolling message belt buckels.... what now?
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
And I can say one thing, I look pretty good in high wasted pants. I don't know if that helps. But I do. God I'm high.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
i told the cop we knew everyone at the party, it was 250 of our closest friends and she's like funny nobody on the balcony knew whose house this was
Thats why they were on the balcony!
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Looks like he unfriended you too. I feel like we were both just handed negative pregnancy tests.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
My ultimate hope is that people will hug me, smell me, and therefore think I'm classy.
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