I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
People with herpes should wear stickers.
9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
i dont even know how to be here
Do you have any idea how hard it is to cum to Chingy?!
she has a picture of her daughter riding a giant rooster.. of course i want to make obscene cock jokes
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
I'm not sure how many more innuendos I can slip into this fucking conversation before I just blatantly say "I want to fuck you."
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
I'm going to stop at grocery on the way home. I'm CRAVING wine from a sippy cup. We have neither wine nor sippy cups.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I know she’s pissed I fucked her husband, but I didn’t know he was married until after I blew him at Legoland
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
