No stitches, just platelets and will power
no matter how many times i close my eyes and hit ignore on my phone. i must remind myself shit i still have to see her at work
I apparently took a 45 minute shower, and became best friends with his mom.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I blacked out at the bar, and blcked in getting a handjob on a roller coaster. Sober me is jealous of drunk me.
Eating cold pizza and drinking a beer for breakfast while standing in a hotel window naked is how I say hello September...
Pack light, we're going straight to bar from the train. No place to put our shit.
Dude all I'm bringing is my dick and a phone charger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't feel sorry for me. I'm getting Red Lobster and sex tonight. Nothing can bring me too far down.
My exam ends at 4pm so I plan to be passed out in the bar by 5pm. Want to join me?
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I think I'm just going to go like every guy on tinder who has a jetski. I'm doing this for us, Summer is coming.
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
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