I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
we can't become the bulimic house in the complex dude. Besides, you need teeth for your career.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
I swear to god, allah, buddah and motherfucking oprah winfrey... if I have to stay here any longer because you are holding us up I will choke you out.
Dude I'm driving around California right now hiding little bags of weed in random places like Easter eggs so that I can come back and find them later
Haha ohman remember when I peed in your blender? Gotta love college.
YOU DID WHAT???
Also fucking you night and morning and then serving your parents breakfast is a bit awkward. And funny. To me.
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
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