Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
In a world where you don't want your phone to pocket dial your parents at 2 in the morning while you're running around Florida shitfaced, Droid does.
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
If she doesnt understand your inherent need to teabag an emo chick, do you really want to be with her?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
I think my hand is broken. But his nose definitely is
This number has temporarily been disconnected and will be restored to service once you get rid of you girlfriend.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
my life could not get any worse. just saw my sister in a porno
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
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