yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cant believe that bitch gave me herpes. she said those bumps were just a part of the natural landscape
wait, did she really refer to her vagina as a landscape?
why are you more concerned about her word choice than the fact that I HAVE FUCKING HERPES
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I never thought the first time a taser would be used on me would be at an applebees
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HELP A SISTER OUT. AND KEEP YOUR TONGUE OUT OF THE HUMMUS.
TOO HIGH TO FIGURE THIS SHIT OUT
You're the only person I know who could blow literal chunks, laugh about it, then proceed to shotgun another beer. Love you champ.
"I'm pretty sure all our toasts were to Ben Afflecks penis last night."
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
its as if im in a choose your own adventure book. except im not the reader and someone else is choosing my fate...one awesome decision at a time.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
Randomize