Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
I have no memory of puking on someone. Was he cute?
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
My vagina is depressed thinking about her future.
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
Well he fell three stories from the balcony and still had the strength to fuck me for 2 hours.
Just so you know my hand is still healing from where you drunkenly clawed me last Saturday
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
The guy at the rodeo just told me "if ya don't say none, ya don't get none". What the hell does that mean?
Im pretty sure you just got hit on by a gay cowboy.....
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
I don't think he understands that his kid doesn't bother me. I have a binder full of developmentally appropriate early childhood activities.
Either go for divorced men who are forty plus or stop doing this immediately. You are 23 years old. You need more wine and less baby fever
i told someone my fallback plan was to be a slutty bartender and i needed the practice as i straddled them to pour a shot
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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