great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
Maybe the downfall to liking really smart guys is that they're to smart to think about sex all the time.
Of course drinkings involved. They don't call it alcoholism because we eat too many skittles.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
i think smoking weed in a ladies bathroom on the beach with two dudes might be the shadiest thing ive done in a while
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Well its official, I'm into significantly freakier sex than even I thought possible.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Randomize
