She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i just added no after every hockey player in my phone..
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
you should probably know that there's a naked dude in your window
i wouldn't normally say anything but you seem to not be there
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just masturbated to the thought of him straight up talking to me. to us having a conversation. What the hell.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Hi. I have frying pans taped to my feet. I achave to go the hospital, theyre on pretty tight. Can't feel legs bring me juice
Yes. I had to slow down my handjob so he would last...-and I give shitty handjobs to begin with
She got a boob job, dumped her husband, became a stripper, got a DUI in her Porsche and is now dating her lawyer
I’m making her my life coach if med school doesn’t work out
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