I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
I swear that when I have my own bathroom, I'm gonna lock myself in there and masterbate for at least 3 days in sheer appreciation of it.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
Seriously though, you almost tore my right nipple off.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
No more going to class sober.. Tried it for a day or two, its just not for me
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
He called me khaleesi while I rode his dick. He wins
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
Oh yeah, nothing says welcome home like walking in on your parents having sex on your bed while the dog is watching, they told me to wait until they were done...
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
I don’t have enough daddy issues for this shit, make him go away
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