i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
Its not that I'm getting free haircuts... Its just that she is paying for sex with haircuts...
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
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