real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
I went to moterboat her and I started laughing, so I just kinda blew on them... I think I'm gona call that move the sailboat.
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
someone was throwing condoms at us.
no, they just magically show up around you.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Does he not understand that naked slip and slide needs supervision after dark?!
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I woke up in her bed, she woke up in mine. Apparently there was a miscommunication after the 8th jager bomb.
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
No other awkward car ride can beat the one you give your drug dealer home.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I just bought a slurpee and condoms. God bless America.
Randomize
