she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I legit had to pull him off my car. Then he texted me saying 'take me places.' Shotgun getting that drunk tonight
The waitress just told me I'm asking alot. So far I've asked for a soul, an angel and carbombs
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
I'd invite you over to drink but then I wouldn't be drinking by myself.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
